Monday, January 21, 2008

Romance = Money?

In the words of Mr. Fabulous, my best friend in this city, I "have the worst luck in the world" when it comes to dating.

Yup, he said that during a dinner we had before a college basketball game. It was me, Mr. Fabulous, his boyfriend, and two other guys with whom I have some classes in common. Upon Mr. Fabulous' uttering of that statement, his boyfriend elbowed him underneath the table. I could see the movement because Mr. Fabulous jerked right up in his seat and then looked at his dude, "What? It's true!"

I smiled , "He's totally right, you know." I sipped on my beer and my mind wandered back to the events of the past ten days.

The Internet Guy and I hung out a few times after our lovely first kiss. However, the following dates became progressively more and more... de-lovely.

First of all, call me old-fashioned and crazy, but isn't a guy supposed to pay for at least one drink when he's out with a girl he supposedly likes? Okay, so he bought one drink. Just one. We were out at this amazing lounge, buzzing with beautiful people, on a Friday night and he made such a huge deal out of him buying me a drink.

He also kept bringing up how broke he is even though he doesn't make a whole lot less money than I do. Granted, I do get some monetary help from my family - they take care of my rent. But good Lord, that man just kept talking money, money, money like it was the only thing on his mind. Maybe he was feeling resentment towards me for making more than him. But if that's the case then he must feel resentment ALL the time, because a LOT of people are more financially stable than him.

And there I was thinking that maybe I should date a guy without looking at his wallet. Not that I ever have before, I was just always after more-or-less ambitious guys. And ambitious guys, in general, tend to not be broke.

So by the end of the night, I think we were both beginning to harbor some feelings of anger towards each other. Him, I imagine, for buying me a drink. Me, clearly, for him being such an incredible cheapskate.

We did end up making out that night, but the chemistry was gone for the most part.

Right now, I'm not sure if it's over or not. He's got many positive qualities like his personality and his sense of humor... but those are the qualities that friends have; to sustain my romantic interests, a guy needs to possess so much more. I mean, is it too much to ask to be taken out to a nice dinner on a date?

That's the thing: with this guy, I can only count on a nice dinner on a wedding day. And, hell no, I am not waiting that long.


PrincessPolly said...

Okay, he sounds like a bit of a loser now! While I don't think we girls generally expect blokes to pay for EVERYTHING, I think we do at least expect him to be WILLING to! Shame, he sounded so promising in the last post, that kiss and everything. :(

Fluffycat said...

Well, better to weed this out early. Take it from me, you do NOT want to get seriously involved with someone who is weird about money like that. Even if he just said, aw, can we go dutch? in a nice way, that's way better than complaining about it.

Airam said...

Oh man. The fact that he had to keep mentioning that he bought you a drink is ridiculous. I would've been like, "do you want your money back or do you want me to buy you a drink now so we're even?"

I'm all for going dutch but if a guy offers to pay, I just would hope he wouldn't keep throwing that in my face!

Scotty said...

Guy always pays. If girl offers to, guy insists he still pay. If girl offers to second time, he lets her. Why make a big deal of nothing right?

Anonymous said...

I may be naive, but I think he deserves another chance. The fact that he kept talking about how broke he is probably means he's really worried about his financial future. Maybe he's really short on cash this month and he's feeling uncomfortable going to this really amazing lounge, especially if there are $15 martinis on the menu.
Did he pick the place?

Laundramatic said...

In response to anonymous:

I suppose I could see where his behavior could be justifiable in the setting that you've mentioned, however:

1) yes, he was the one who picked the place. he said he goes there all the time

2) we're not talking 15 dollar martinis here; I'm talking... a four dollar bottle of Corona

narcissiste said...

Oh... then he's really cheap.

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