Saturday, January 26, 2008

Another Day, Another Date

I have decided to stick with the online dating web site for a little while longer. After all, some consider online dating to be the new black. At any rate, I have landed myself a date with a new guy. Contrary to Mr. Cheapo from the previous post, I started talking to the new guy just a few days ago. before I knew it, we were making plans to meet up for drinks.

So here I was again, driving to a bar on a Friday night. Surprisingly, I did not feel nervous at all. It is as if, in the course of going on dates with douchebags, flakes, and cheapskates, I have forgotten how to be excited about a mere prospect of a date. The days of nervous pre-date jitters just might be over for me (but god, I sure hope not).

I walked into a bar and right away spotted my date ordering a drink from a bartender. I walked up and smiled, "Hey?"

I could tell right from the beginning that I exceeded his expectations in terms of my appearance. During the first hour of our conversation, he kept glancing me over, checking me out. I felt slightly uncomfortable but flattered at the same time. It was a mixed emotion, and I didn't know what to make of it.

At first our plan was to just have drinks for an hour or so and then part ways. He, after all, had a birthday party downtown to attend. But after realizing that perhaps he wasn't a total creep, I agreed to join him at that party.

The club where the celebration was taking place was the most hideous place I have ever been to. Without sounding snobby or overly picky, I will say that you know that a city has a shitty nightlife when one of the premier clubs looks like an Applebee's with a dirty dance floor and a mechanical bull. The cheese factor was completed by a stage, lit up with obnoxiously bright lights and huge white stars on blue painted walls.

The guy finally bought me a drink. Thank God! I thought I had another Mr. Cheapo on my hands. But no, this dude had the decently to spend more than 4 dollars on a date. I let out a sigh of relief.

After an uncomfortable meet and greet ( I must have met ten or more of the guy's friends), we finally got a chance to hang out one on one and get to know each other better. As much as two people can get to know each other in a loud night club.

The conversation was going okay, except that I couldn't help but be slightly bothered by a very bizarre jacket he was wearing the whole time. It was this wetlands-green oversized monstrocity covered with a hideous pattern of large circles. It was hot in the place but the guy wore that damn thing all night long.

So then, he tried pulling an ever-so-classy move of trying to kiss me in the view of everyone at the club, including his friends. I turned my head, avoiding the unfortunate collision and followed the rejection up with, "I don't really make out with my dates at clubs." I mean, I don't know what his intentions really were, but I'm pretty sure they had something to do with trying to mack it up in front of his buddies. Nice try.

At the end of the night, I ended up giving him a ride home, since I guess, HIS ride left the club early. Can't say that I blame him. That place was every shade of tacky.

Just before exiting my car, he leaned in to kiss me again and I gave in and kissed him back for a few seconds. I mean, sheesh, that's probably the most action I'm gonna get in a loooooong time.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Romance = Money?

In the words of Mr. Fabulous, my best friend in this city, I "have the worst luck in the world" when it comes to dating.

Yup, he said that during a dinner we had before a college basketball game. It was me, Mr. Fabulous, his boyfriend, and two other guys with whom I have some classes in common. Upon Mr. Fabulous' uttering of that statement, his boyfriend elbowed him underneath the table. I could see the movement because Mr. Fabulous jerked right up in his seat and then looked at his dude, "What? It's true!"

I smiled , "He's totally right, you know." I sipped on my beer and my mind wandered back to the events of the past ten days.

The Internet Guy and I hung out a few times after our lovely first kiss. However, the following dates became progressively more and more... de-lovely.

First of all, call me old-fashioned and crazy, but isn't a guy supposed to pay for at least one drink when he's out with a girl he supposedly likes? Okay, so he bought one drink. Just one. We were out at this amazing lounge, buzzing with beautiful people, on a Friday night and he made such a huge deal out of him buying me a drink.

He also kept bringing up how broke he is even though he doesn't make a whole lot less money than I do. Granted, I do get some monetary help from my family - they take care of my rent. But good Lord, that man just kept talking money, money, money like it was the only thing on his mind. Maybe he was feeling resentment towards me for making more than him. But if that's the case then he must feel resentment ALL the time, because a LOT of people are more financially stable than him.

And there I was thinking that maybe I should date a guy without looking at his wallet. Not that I ever have before, I was just always after more-or-less ambitious guys. And ambitious guys, in general, tend to not be broke.

So by the end of the night, I think we were both beginning to harbor some feelings of anger towards each other. Him, I imagine, for buying me a drink. Me, clearly, for him being such an incredible cheapskate.

We did end up making out that night, but the chemistry was gone for the most part.

Right now, I'm not sure if it's over or not. He's got many positive qualities like his personality and his sense of humor... but those are the qualities that friends have; to sustain my romantic interests, a guy needs to possess so much more. I mean, is it too much to ask to be taken out to a nice dinner on a date?

That's the thing: with this guy, I can only count on a nice dinner on a wedding day. And, hell no, I am not waiting that long.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

First (Good) Kiss

I did the unthinkable.

I started hanging out with a guy from a dating web site that I joined recently.

Now, now, I am not COMPLETELY crazy (yet). I took my sweet-ass time to get to know him, whatever that might mean in an online world. Late night IMs and all that jazz - we did it all before we decided to meet.

I must say it was weird at first. On our respective web pages we stated that we were looking for "Friendship Only". For whatever (okay, primarily safety) reason, I decided that if I were to dive into the world on online dating, I wasn't going to dive into a sea full of bloodthirsty sharks with my hands tied behind my back, metaphorically speaking.

After talking to each other online for almost a month, we've decided to meet at a local bar. We were also going to bring our friends, just so that our night wouldn't be completely and totally lost if we ended up hating each other the minute we laid our eyes on each other.

Except that all my friends (all two of them in Cincinnati) just HAPPENED to be out of town. Fine, I thought to myself as I was driving to the bar that Friday night, I will try to enjoy myself as much as possible, regardless the circumstances.

Well, much to my surprise, I ended up having the time of my life even though nothing even remotely romantic happened that night. After we parted our ways and I closed the door of my apartment, I was left completely alone with my pesky thoughts.

I can overanalyze any situation to death and beyond, you see. I suppose I am a typical woman in that respect. So naturally, I began to question the events of the night. Why didn't he seem interested in me? Why didn't he kiss me?

Oh sure, so his friend tagged along with us. That's still no excuse. Is it? Maybe I just don't have the "it" factor any more? Maybe I am turning into an old maid at 23? Oh God, the horror!

I played the waiting game. I've learned to play it well and the waiting paid off. He IMed me to ask if I wanted to grab drinks on Wednesday night. I breathed a sigh of relief as I typed a confident "yes".

We met at a bar where everything seemed to be made of plush and velvet. The DJ was skillfully spinning old school hip-hop and progressive rock with a dash of 80's pop in between. I instantly fell in love with the place and as boy talked about this and that, my mind kept shamelessly digressing to the candid thoughts of kissing him.

I still could not, for the life of me, figure out if he liked me as more than a friend though. And as the night continued on, I made a decision that if he liked me in a strictly platonic way I was willing to be just friends with him. I couldn't dare to put an end to our witty, silly and honest conversations with a kiss.

We ended our night at the bar with a dance, and my hopes for a romantic future were as high as the sky as he brushed against my hand with his on the way to my car, and then intertwined his fingers with mine. Sweet.

As we walked down the empty midnight streets, we began a game of playfully pushing each other. Before I knew it, we took our game to a car parking lot. I was trying to escape him and he was trying to catch me. I quickly ran out of breath (jesus, when was the last time I played tag with anyone?) and he caught up with me, grabbing me from behind and lightly biting my shoulder. I squealed for heightened dramatic effect and spun around, trying to avoid another bite. He paused for a second, as did I, and for that I received a lighter shoulder bite just moments later. He paused again, his face closer to mine this time. He waited for me to pull back. I didn't, and that's when it happened.

It was very movie-like, that kiss, minus the random out-of-nowhere fireworks in the sky. But, in a way, it was so much better than any movie I have ever seen. It was real.