Finals Week

I open one of my eyes and glare at my alarm clock that's squealing on my window sill.

"WAKE UP! WAKE UP!"

My body still needs at least 3 more hours of sleep, but I know that sleep is not the kind of luxury I can afford right now. I twist and turn in my bed and cover my ears with a pillow. I can still hear it though.

"WAKE UP! WAKE UP!"

I think of all the projects due the beginning of next week. I think of how I am afraid of failure. I think of how I need to get up and study for a quiz in my environmental technologies class. I think of my friends back at home and how much I miss them. I think of my fluffy little cat I could just pick up and hug and feel his fur tickle my nose when I kiss him. I think of my many failed relationships with men and how that cliche saying that all women are attracted to assholes must be true, because I am one of those women. I think of how I'm tired of wanting to get revenge on the Asshole from a few weeks ago, because even though it feels good, I just don't have the time or the energy to make him hurt. Because really, I am SO over him.

The last very intense couple of days of work have almost been an escape for me, in a crazy sadistic way. I tire myself out to a point of not wanting to think about anything else. Thing that usually bothers me, the usual worries that loom above my head fade out into the background. It's just me and my project. Mullions, acetate, vellum, mylar, and all the architectural terms I would have otherwise never learned if I'd chosen some other profession are words that my vocabulary currently revolves around.

"WAKE UP! WAKE THE FUCK UP!"

I slam the snooze button with my fist. The clock immediately shuts up, but instead of closing my eyes again and going back to sleep, I slowly rise in my bed.

Okay, okay, I'm up.

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On Getting Revenge

I would go into a detailed description of my past weekend and my couple of dates with a guy I started seeing recently. I would tell about our outing on Friday night and our many drinks and laughs we shared in my favorite bar in Cincinnati. I would also tell about our trip to the movies the next day and how he held my hand in the darkness of the movie theater. Then, I would tell about our lavish dinner that same night and how when he left the next day to go back to his home town, he smiled ever so charmingly and said, "I really like you" before driving away.

I walked away happy that day, after sending him off on his way home. Except that I didn't know that it would be the last time I'd ever see him. And why would I choose not to ever see him after an amazingly blissful weekend? Because he, as it turns out, had a little agenda of his own. And I found out about that agenda using the good ol' internet search engine.

Monday, November 12:
It was unusual for him not to call me today since previously he would call every day for two weeks, sometimes even twice during the same day. I knew something was up, as I had already had a similar experience with a different guy back in June. I decided to brush my fears and IM him that night with a cheeful hello (aka hello with a smiley face). He replied back and we had a very brief, very dry conversation.
"Don't take it personally," he wrote, "I just have a lot to do this week for my night classes and work. I am so tired."

I wished him luck on his project and with that he signed off. His excuse worked on me this time, and I, as any reasonable person would surely do, decided to give him more time. Maybe he'd pay more attention to me and return to his old affectionate self after he got all the stress factors out of the way. Maybe.

Tuesday, November 13:

He had not called or emailed at all today. I IMed him again after he signed on online. The conversation went in a very similar manner as the previously day though. He was tired, stressed out, whatever. I was trying to be understanding again, but I was getting impatient. What happened to the sweet, adorable guy he was just days ago?

Wednesday, November 14:

All day I was hoping he'd call. Around noon, it dawned upon me that perhaps I should stop hoping. After he signed onto AIM that night and hadn't IMed me in more than an hour, I finally stopped hoping. Of course, I was also very pissed at that point, so I sent him a message:

"Are you serious? You are not gonna talk to me at all?"

He replied with a cold, "I only signed on briefly to talk to my friend about an apartment. So no, I'm going to bed now."

"Yeah, whatever," was all I could say back.

Thursday, November 15:

I received a message on Facebook from a guy who friended me on there a while ago, for one reason or another. He saw my rather angry status message in his News Feed ("Laundramatic is sick of bullshit") and asked what was wrong. I spilled my guts to him about everything, because I needed someone to talk to. He said that if I wanted to grab a drink with him later on, he'd be more than happy to take me out. I told him that that may happen sometime down the road... but not now. I wasn't ready.

That afternoon I sent the douchebag my last email, "Thanks for acting like a total asshole. I didn't expect that from you." OF COURSE, I didn't get a reply back.

Bored and angry, I did an online search of his full name and came upon an unexpected and unsettling discovery. Turns out, he's a member of a certain dating site and I saw him and other girls leaving each other flirtatious comments on a message board. This was happening all throughout our brief dating period and continued to that very moment. There were also talks between him and one girl of meeting up offline. Oh no, he didn't!

That night I put things in a perspective because I was tired of being angry. At least I didn't waste as much time on this asshole as I did on Mr X. I could just forget and move on, except that I wanted to teach the douche a lesson....

I created a profile on the said dating website under a false name. With false information. False location. False attributes. Everything 100% fake. A good friend volunteered to help and provided me with two of her pictures so I could add some legitimacy to my fake posting. Now my profile was complete. All I had left to do was send the scumbag a message and wait.

"Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I think you're adorable ;)"

Not too suggestive, slightly flirtatious, inviting of a response - I've created a bait.

Friday, November 16:

There was one new message in my Alter Ego's mail box today from none other than the asshole.
"You're pretty hot yourself. i'm in X University this weekend for the football game let me write you back on sunday."

He took the bait. Now it's my turn to have a little fun.

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What Goes Around...

So many things happened in a matter of just over a week. But first thing's always first: I got my dream job!

It is for the duration of the winter and summer quarters and I will be working from Cincinnati heping with the design of the largest resort in Las Vegas. The pay isn't much... in fact, I negotiated for my hourly salary to be raised by a dollar and it still isn't much. But this job is an amazing opportunity for me to get my foot in the door of the entertainment business. I ultimately want to design upscale hotels, casinos and nightclubs all over the world.

This job offer also gave me an enormous morale boost. My ego's been stroked and I feel of tremendous value to the world. One of the top architectural firms in the country hired me, and it will only get better from here. Time to do the happy dance!

Moving onto the more private, yet no less exciting, matters of my love life: Just last week after writing one of my blog posts about the flaky guy I was seeing, I realized that I needed to be treated way better than I was. I called Flaky out on the fact that he never calls when he says he would, and I don't have the time, nor the energy to play games. He sounded stunned and taken aback by my direct and blunt confrontation, and he mumbled something about being busy and not having any money. You know, excuses, and all the stuff I just did not want to hear.

Today Flaky called me after six days of not contacting me to "catch up". Pshhht, catch up my ass. He told me he paid off over 1000 dollars of his debt this week and that he's got some lucrative business presentations coming up next week. I didn't care. I wasn't impressed.

Little does Flaky know that I've already moved on and am now seeing a new guy. I will not get into details for this is all so very new, but I will say that he is coming to Cincinnati for a three day weekend, starting this Friday, and if everything goes well, I will post about him in more detail next week.

I feel slightly guilty for possibly leading Flaky on, in the fact that I haven't told him about the new guy I am seeing, and I also told him to give me a call later if he wants. But, he brought it upon himself. He's had me hanging on a string for a few days too long. Now it's his turn.

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